Secrets and approval

[mtbc]

While trimming my hair today, it occurred to me why it might be easy for me to keep secrets. I like some kinds of social approval, like being recognized as being good at detail-oriented technical creativity and execution, but mostly I have enough confidence in myself that I don't need validation from others, so I am not tempted to make people feel as if we are in some private club together or to seem interesting or whatever by divulging confidences to them. After all, I assume that's why people do it.

Then I got to wondering, if I don't much seek that more general validation, why I still try to keep the front yard neat, etc., and figured it's more about feeling a responsibility to be a decent member of the community, rather than wanting any approving murmurs from neighbors. After all, I suppose I did defend a Satanist on local social media so it's not as if I'm looking for people's votes! That responsibility I feel is not a reasoned thing, it's received values from my childhood.

Comments

[wpadmirer]

That is a really positive thing.

I think that doing right, just because you know it's right and it makes you feel good is the best way to be.

People who need the approval of others are not as likely to do the right thing when there's social pressure not to do it.

[mtbc]

Thank you, that is an interesting point that had not occurred to me.