Productivity obstacles

I get a fair few hours of alertness each week that I have some freedom to use, even aside from the time before bed when I am winding down and relaxing. I also have things to do that are not getting done.

I think that the root of my problem is that I never quite worked out how to be part of a family in any efficient way. If I were living alone then I would look around and see things that need doing and just get up and do them. Living with my family, I usually don't, for a couple of reasons:

First, some of what I would do affects them in some way. Like, shelves need clearing and sorting, stuff needs moved around and stored or whatever. They have an interest in much of that stuff so I want them to be in the loop. But, they have limited free time too: even if I am willing to trade a fair bit of my own leisure time, I don't want to ongoingly demand significant amounts of their time. Especially, I am sure my eldest could do with whatever downtime they can get with Highers coming up.

Second, I want to be available to them. While they are often engaged in activities that don't include interaction with me, I want to be there for interaction should opportunities arise. I love them and want to be with them more than just sharing the same room. I can go elsewhere and do useful things and tell them not to hesitate to interrupt me but I would then miss more casual opportunities for conversation.

I notice that what I do get done is what I can do from the room they are in but that does not require anything from them nor much concentration from me: for example, working through the day's mail and making online bill payments accordingly.

The solution to the second problem is obvious though I have been poor at effecting it: I need to exert willpower and disappear off and do stuff for a while. For the first, perhaps I can impose more on their free time or go ahead and disrupt their stuff and handle my part of it then leave them to deal with the aftermath at their convenience.

Accumulating to-do's

I notice that I am often feeling tense. I have a large matter that is blocked on waiting for information from a county council that reasonably ought to have been provided weeks ago. I have various skin issues that are resisting the usual cures. There is so much cleaning and sorting to be done at home, including to make the cross-trainer accessible again so I can return to exercising. I need to make progress with various personal computing issues even outwith the unresolved dedicated server situation that distracted me in recent months.

While waking up with a headache and backache this morning did not help, I have generally felt a bit more alert and energetic lately so perhaps that will help me to get out of my previous established rut and become more on top of things. This afternoon perhaps I will mow the yard: that is another matter that ongoingly demands time and attention. Naturally the mower is a bit buried under other stuff right now. While I feel challenged by how persistently behind I am with everything, the good news is that I am not daunted: despite not having devised a credible solution I do not despair so maybe I have faith that things will improve.

Strikingly bald

I noticed during a videoconference yesterday than among my team at work I am the baldest. I went bald in my thirties; a relative also did. I don't much mind but it does mean that on nice days I need to remember to bring a hat along. I will probably live long enough to discover if I have passed the same down to my son. I can suffer from seborrheic dermatitis which is apparently associated with hair loss.

Indulging in leisurely distractions

When I first left home I mostly gave up computer games: they are just too appealing and unproductive for me. I would still happily spend many hours a day playing games if I could. I am also cautious about alcohol: I like it a bit more than I would a normal tasty drink so I make sure to occasionally go several days without it and to avoid it when I feel stressed enough that it would be unusually welcome. Food is another thing that I find that I really do appreciate. I don't have fancy tastes: hot buttered toast is among my favorite foods. I am not a hedonist but I do greatly appreciate some of life's simple pleasures.

The worst pastime in which I much indulge is television dramas. To wind down for the last couple of hours before sleep I find that passive escapist consumption works well. Furthermore, I find many shows to be genuinely engaging: it is not just a case of finding something to watch because there are enough good shows on, at least in my opinion, that I do not want to miss out on those experiences.

For instance, Counterpart (2017)'s first season just finished and we just had the BBC's brief adaptation of The City and the City (2018) (I liked the book) but we are now into new seasons of The Americans (2013) and Legion (2017), the new season of Westworld (2016) is about to start and Netflix just dumped on us the new season of Money Heist (2017). They each have their merits: taking a couple of those, I find Counterpart an interesting exploration of how we are shaped by our environment and Legion is very imaginatively varied in how it uses photography and music to tell its story. Admittedly, Money Heist was just my latest moreish guilty pleasure.

I need to relax my brain toward the end of the evening or I cannot sleep. I get enough enjoyment from television that I figure that it may as well be my drug of choice even if I find myself suspecting it of being an avoidable waste of my time. I note that a book that is interesting but not a page-turner, like Geert Mak's In Europe, can also get me ready for sleep but maybe it suffices to be careful to not watch many hours' television each night. I can allow myself some pleasures.