mtbc: maze L (green-white)
I have been quieter lately through feeling tired and irritable. I am usually at my desk by 8h or so and, in fasting, I don't take time for lunch, but I don't want to leave too weirdly early so I usually stay until 16h30 or so. Sometimes I stay later, for example on Tuesday I stayed beyond 17h because, as I was wrapping up, a series of three people came to ask me things. This is okay, I like to be helpful, but it did mean a longer workday.

Unfortunately, I awoke rather prematurely on Wednesday. I do not make much use at home of unexpected morning time because I am distracted by knowing that I have to leave the house so I just head to work unusually early. Over the afternoon I had a migraine, though not quite bad enough to prevent me from working, and on the way home I had a detour via the doctor's office which added maybe a half-hour to my trip, so that became a long day indeed. Yesterday I again awoke well before the alarm and started my workday correspondingly early.

An early workday makes sense for me. )

I have wondered if, though I do not eat at lunchtime, I could instead use the time well for some other personal task. I am not sure what that might be, though. Especially, I like to keep my own work separate from my paid work, on different computers, but I do not want to risk routinely bringing my own laptop into work. I do at least sometimes take a brief walk, as I did today to the mailbox.

Recently my work has been difficult. )

I have also been unusually busy at home. For example, last Saturday one of my children needed to be in Dundee all day and tomorrow they both need to be. So, that is basically a day of the weekend rather perturbed. I thus wonder if everything has added up to push me a little over a tipping point lately.

Feeling myself to be much inclined to utter screw this and let chips fall, I skipped exercising for a couple of days and have instead treated myself a little: for instance, after exercising yesterday I took a bath instead of a quick shower. Today I felt somewhat better. Not only did I sleep for longer but I also felt a little more enthusiastic. I did well in my exercising. Perhaps I am returning to a more tolerable state of mind but I will try not to push it too far.
mtbc: maze L (green-white)
Unusually I had considerable insomnia last night: I awoke after 3h and did not sleep well thereafter. I did get up for a little while and drank some water. I had a slow start at work but got through the day okay. I have taken things fairly easy* this evening and hope to sleep rather better tonight.

While awake I did lie in bed quite a lot: I was sleepy enough to remain there without being too restless and mostly with my eyes closed. I suspect that I did manage to nap because time did pass reasonably quickly and I would occasionally have the increasingly strange thoughts that feel as if my dreaming machinery is starting up before I lose consciousness. As I lay there thinking I wondered, is it advantageous to still lie relaxed in bed if sleep is not coming? Is it quite recuperative or actually little better than just coming downstairs, making a cup of tea and watching some television?

*Why isn't it easily?
mtbc: maze H (magenta-black)
I typically watch some television every night because if I do anything more intellectually active late in the evening than I cannot easily get to sleep afterward: at the end of the day I seem to need to wind down. After having made some tangible progress in my paid Java work yesterday, in the evening I moved on to some bash scripting for scraping the BBC's education website. It was menial enough, mostly just some inelegantly written for, grep and sed that only half had my attention as I was also watching coverage of last fall's Wisconsin Book Festival then a couple of episodes of Fauda (2015). But, I still felt wide awake quite late and had to read a little in bed to calm my mind down. I have thus relearned to be just passively entertained within a couple of hours of retiring upstairs.
mtbc: photograph of me (mark)
I still seem to be needing plenty of sleep. I was probably actually asleep by 2200 last night but it still wasn't easy to drag myself out of bed at 0600; it took me maybe even a half hour to creak properly into life this morning. Between household matters, helping with and eating a meal, watching some television, etc., early nights leave precious little time in the evening for anything else.
mtbc: photograph of me (mark)
I seem to have slept fairly solidly for around ten hours last night. I wonder what's going on with me in recent weeks as I've had a few long sleeps. This morning's dreams included my employer buying me a fifty-minute massage at a spa but I'm not holding my breath for it being precognitive.
mtbc: maze J (red-white)
While I remain suspicious of the current quality of my bed's mattress, my experimentation in recent weeks suggests that it is sleeping on my front that causes my lower back to ache. I sometimes do it anyway because it feels as if it will be the most comfortable next position: in repositioning I am often following a specific urge toward the next. Still, I am now trying to reduce my time on my front; it's cheaper than risking a new mattress.
mtbc: maze L (green-white)
After awakening this morning I quickly felt quite well and alert. Normally this would not be a surprise: I went to bed not long after 2200 and wakefulness is typically quite binary with me: I am unconscious, then shortly afterward I am alert, bored in bed, thinking about what needs to be done. I am definitely a morning person.

In recent days though this hasn't been the case. I've gone to bed at a good time, awoken a little too early, then laid there in a semi-wakeful state where I feel as if I am awake but I don't feel like moving and strange dream-like thoughts come easily to mind. (At night I know when I am ready to fall asleep because the strange thoughts are coming easily.) It's been an effort to drag myself out of bed and it was only really after swimming a couple of lengths at the gym that I would start to feel much alert.

One thought is that I have been subconsciously troubled. I was thinking earlier this week about disposing of more of my late father's possessions, especially his guitars: he was right-handed and we are all left-handed; guitar construction is deeply chiral. I remember thinking to myself on Thursday about how I wish I could have been there for him more, but he couldn't really travel and since graduating I never lived near them. We make choices, we thus reject others, and pay the price accordingly. I wish I could be there more for my mother too but at least she is more able to travel: she is visiting for a few days next month.
mtbc: maze J (red-white)
I noticed that I may be more likely to awaken with back pain if I was sleeping on my belly. Some searching online confirms the likelihood of this and advises sleeping on one's side. Perhaps I can get used to resisting inclinations to do otherwise. After all, with my dieting I have mostly simply got used to the feeling of being hungry.
mtbc: maze J (red-white)
[personal profile] mst3kmoxie's bed much helps her back and she kindly gave it up for me to try last night. It was so bad for my back that I moved back to my own bed in the night.

I do find some interesting information online, such as that mattresses can be too firm for people with back problems, but there are enough mutually contradictory reviews of the mattresses that are plausibly within my meager price range that I think I'll punt on all this for a while. I am willing to spend more on items that I use frequently and will last for a long time but since our move to Scotland our budget is tight indeed: now asset purchases of a few hundred pounds get a line item in my budget spreadsheet with a cell for how many years the cost is to be amortized over and [personal profile] mindstalk is quite correct about my risk-aversion on what for me is a big-ticket purchase.

All is not lost, though. I sit now in my armchair with a blanket wedged into the small of my back. Perhaps I can try sleeping on my back with some kind of small pillow wedged in there.
mtbc: maze J (red-white)
Some of my father's family have lower back problems. I have to be careful with mine, being careful about how I lift, and sitting with good lumbar support. I've done fairly well over recent months but sometimes I awaken with a moderately sore back and it improves over the morning. My current mattress is basically a large block of firm foam with a memory foam topper.

I wonder if I should get a different mattress. But, they are expensive things, and it is not obvious which ones might be a worthwhile improvement. I probably won't make any immediate changes while I ponder the matter.
mtbc: maze J (red-white)
Despite catching up on disturbed sleep yesterday morning I got back to sleep at a sensible time last night and slept well. I took a decongestant before bed. The sky has cleared and the temperature hovers around freezing. Swimming went well and I felt quite good. This morning I shared the swimming lane with two people faster than I which was quite nice as nobody is in my way and it is easy to pause occasionally to let them past.

Work also went well, at least in the afternoon. The next step I'd talked myself into was mistaken but I noticed and fixed a bug and made other useful progress. Over coming weeks I may go to some local microscope seminars to improve my background knowledge.

I haven't had much pain but I do still feel as if I have congestion in my head. I had a mild headache growing over the afternoon. I asked Ola to consult her hygrometer and she reported a reading of 24% which sounds like a plausible culprit. Perhaps I could have a special water hat that feeds damp air into an accompanying mask when I am at work.
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