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A quiet weekend of relaxing and thinking
After many rather sunny days, the low pressure systems reached us from the west and our weekend weather has been rather changeable, not ideal for long walks. We are camping again soon, with luck the weather will be arranged differently by then. Though, sporadic showers aren't too bad, our tents are cosy.
This weekend is unusually quiet. I am
Ordinarily, this situation should have lit something of a fire under my ass. However, in some ways, I've felt exhausted, and have been grateful for the respite of this weekend. I have kept to easy food, today's including some corned beef and mustard on sourdough that R. baked from their new starter, and a quite starchy vegetable soup from a chilled carton that we bought from Tesco at quite a discount.
Taking a bit of a breather has helped me think about priorities. Full-time work and household-related tasks seem to leave me little energy remaining for myself. Now that I feel as if I have gotten to take a breath, I feel like doing things again, hence my writing this entry. In recent years, I do have spare time, just that lack of mental energy also. I love interacting with R., that always feels right. I should also get my teeth into, say, some new personal computing project too, it would do me good. I have some languages and projects in mind, and the almost-plan of starting some to discover which engage me. Whatever one's model of ego depletion, I need not exert as much self-control if I like the task at hand.
Over the years, I have read several kind-of-popular-philosophy books and have found the takeaways rather slippery, so then I read them again. Lazily, I like to think that I don't have to figure out things like how Heidegger thinks Sartre got Husserl wrong if other people with more of a head for all that can can do it for me. I keep feeling as if I'm on the cusp of getting somewhere in understanding and application. Perhaps, on the next rereadings, I should take and organize notes, thus making footholds that finally get me over the hump. In a nutshell, it feels as if I need to make a better habit of ongoingly really seeing and understanding things as they are, so I can make better use of my attention and my life: it's that slippery fish I'm trying to grasp, and I doubt that Gurdjieff's sacred movements are the way for me, nor Huxley's drugs. I think the engagement hinges on habits of both thought and action.
I have also been rereading Iain Banks' Espedair Street. The first time I read it, I had never been to Scotland, and I had since forgotten that it is set here in and around Glasgow. On rereading it, many of the local references mean rather more to me, and he fills in some historical context. Indeed, Worldcon was at
This weekend is unusually quiet. I am
between jobsafter the latest small startup ran short of money. Our gap in income comes at a rather awkward time but life goes on either way so we should make the best of it. Credit will get us some way but there are always consequences, it's
justa matter of choosing the sacrifices.
Ordinarily, this situation should have lit something of a fire under my ass. However, in some ways, I've felt exhausted, and have been grateful for the respite of this weekend. I have kept to easy food, today's including some corned beef and mustard on sourdough that R. baked from their new starter, and a quite starchy vegetable soup from a chilled carton that we bought from Tesco at quite a discount.
Taking a bit of a breather has helped me think about priorities. Full-time work and household-related tasks seem to leave me little energy remaining for myself. Now that I feel as if I have gotten to take a breath, I feel like doing things again, hence my writing this entry. In recent years, I do have spare time, just that lack of mental energy also. I love interacting with R., that always feels right. I should also get my teeth into, say, some new personal computing project too, it would do me good. I have some languages and projects in mind, and the almost-plan of starting some to discover which engage me. Whatever one's model of ego depletion, I need not exert as much self-control if I like the task at hand.
Over the years, I have read several kind-of-popular-philosophy books and have found the takeaways rather slippery, so then I read them again. Lazily, I like to think that I don't have to figure out things like how Heidegger thinks Sartre got Husserl wrong if other people with more of a head for all that can can do it for me. I keep feeling as if I'm on the cusp of getting somewhere in understanding and application. Perhaps, on the next rereadings, I should take and organize notes, thus making footholds that finally get me over the hump. In a nutshell, it feels as if I need to make a better habit of ongoingly really seeing and understanding things as they are, so I can make better use of my attention and my life: it's that slippery fish I'm trying to grasp, and I doubt that Gurdjieff's sacred movements are the way for me, nor Huxley's drugs. I think the engagement hinges on habits of both thought and action.
I have also been rereading Iain Banks' Espedair Street. The first time I read it, I had never been to Scotland, and I had since forgotten that it is set here in and around Glasgow. On rereading it, many of the local references mean rather more to me, and he fills in some historical context. Indeed, Worldcon was at
that bloody exhibition centre.
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