mtbc: maze L (green-white)
My dreams rarely feature much emotion. I often dream of perilous situations but, despite the mortal danger, they are not frightening, just excitingly tense. I had mentioned how I often dream of people who are not part of my real life. For example, I sometimes dream of Anna with whom I have a good romantic relationship. I can be sad when I awaken because I thought that Anna existed and now I am awake I realize that she is fictional so there is a sense of loss but during the actual dream I am doing fine and life is good.

I had a surprise last night in dreaming of a different romantic partner where I experienced great sorrow in the dream itself. She was quite different from Anna: more cheerful and energetic, helpful and encouraging, less intellectual and sophisticated, in looks a little darker and heavier with broader features. She feels familiar but I cannot yet think of anybody on whom she is obviously based. Also, she was quite clearly contemporary, English-speaking and we lived in the West; with Anna it is always in Russian and possibly many decades in the past.

Anyhow, in the dream my wife had died quite suddenly, maybe in her late thirties, and I was thus widowed. I was visiting her family and in the course of that visit I was arranging and cleaning something for her grandmother. The grandmother remarked on how my late wife had always kept that item of her grandmother's so clean and nice and this comment felt very much like her, that she would be doing thoughtful but practical things for her family, so that caused me considerable upset in vividly reminding me of how she used to be and how lucky we had been to have her as a positive force in our lives.

As it is, that she had been such a joy to share life with turns out to be entirely fictional; I do not even remember her name. This journal entry becomes her only memorial. How strange our brains are. I did have a headache arrive yesterday evening and mostly depart this morning so perhaps that pain somehow became an emotional discomfort in the dream.

Update: Fortunately the night after I am back to dreams about non-scary peril. The following morning when I awoke, in my dream I had reached my laboratory and was turning my attention to barricading the door after sending one of my students for bottled water in anticipation of having to hold out against the sudden spread of aggressive zombies.
mtbc: photograph of me (Default)
A brief moment of dream can come with a lot of background about the situation. However, that fades quickly upon waking. Lately I did bother noting the little I still remembered later in the day. Recent recollections include:

  1. Scout groups exchange information, like where is a good place locally for a leader to take their scout troop, by means of a kind of circular wiggly dance. The information costs, though. One of the little girl scouts in the wiggly dance loudly repeated the good-place information and the price of £1,350 much to the annoyance of the scout leader who was providing it and receiving payment. The information trade is not an aspect of scouting that they like to advertise.

  2. I was in some kind of underground mall and there was considerable chaos with people running about in panic and whatnot. We had a girl who needed medical treatment but the hospital off the mall was itself in some chaos. An adult male who was helping to bring her in had some medical knowledge and went to find hospital supplies himself.

  3. There was a group of people in a family-owned pharmacy. A young lady was to be blinded. There was some hesitation but in one of the aisles an adult male blinded her ). I reflected that neither she nor her family would much appreciate such treatment. There was also some doubt that the present need truly outweighed the long-term effects of the maiming of the innocent.

  4. There was an academic in position at one institution and there was a need to get them to take a position offered at a different institution. They and their family normally seemed human but were in fact some kind of insectoid. Knowing exactly what kind of creature they were could help inform how to incentivize them to make the move.
mtbc: maze B (white-black)
On Thursday we have local council elections. This morning I dreamt that I had turned up at my polling place to vote but there was some problem that meant that we could not yet vote at the station: there was a backlog of people waiting. (The polling place did not resemble my real-life current one.) Fortunately (and implausibly), in compensation they were very competently providing us free catering while we waited: plenty of food from Marks & Spencer, a store that is a couple of grades up from what I can typically afford. Unfortunately for me on my diet, without nutritional information and sets of scales and whatnot, I was unable to avail myself of this otherwise-pleasant surprise.
mtbc: photograph of me (Default)
The classic dreams like of one's teeth falling out or accidentally going to work nude or dreaming in monochrome or whatever are not ones that I remember having; perhaps dreams are not amenable to suggestion. I do not even get the apparently usual stress dreams; many of my dreams of situations that in reality might be more nightmarish, such as when my survival is in imminent peril, rarely feel more than tense, not unpleasant.

It thus makes a nice change that this morning I did nearly experience a flying dream: by some mental effort I could locomote quite rapidly, upright but tilting forward, with the top of my feet still dragging behind on the ground. It did occur to me that proper flying would be preferable, and it felt plausibly possible, but I did not manage it on that occasion. I was traversing a winding road with plenty of trees as one might find in the foothills of the Appalachians though it was in more of a town than a rural area. My thinking was to make my commute more efficient and my semi-flying did seem faster and easier than the more usual methods of pedestrian travel.
mtbc: maze G (black-magenta)
When I awaken I quickly forget my dreams: indeed, if I keep a pen and paper by my bed, I can feel the memory quickly melting as I scribble down the details. This morning when I awoke, in my dream I had been hearing a fictional Christmas song by Billy Joel and I did manage to remember the line of the song from when I woke up. Dreamwidth doesn't seem to support even <svg> tags so I doubt it offers me an easy way to render music but I can provide abc notation that at least approximates the fragment of the song that I managed to recall:
X:1
L:1/8
M:4/4
K:C
G2 | d3 c B4 | d3 c B3 G | c3 B A4 |]
w:We | stole a kiss | un-der-neath the | mis-tle-toe
mtbc: photograph of me (Default)
I couldn't sleep so I was strolling among the many other people lying asleep on the ground. A history documentary presenter was walking along as he narrated to camera; this broadcast was going out by satellite. I fell into step beside him because it was the most interesting thing going on. He explained that the Belgians had wanted the British to erect their own Washington Monument but they didn't. The British further irritated them by subsequently erecting a fairly tall monument in honor of Emperor Hirohito on the Canadian side of the Niagara River. The monument was quite a nice white-painted obelisk with the carved text painted black.

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Mark T. B. Carroll

July 2017

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